sorry for no update in a very long time! men nu kommer det att ändras eftersom jag har påsklov :D mimi very mucho happy^^ jag känner att jag är skyldiga er att lägga ut en till update på min senaste novell forever? - forever. SO HERE IT GOES YOU GUYS!

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when we arrived music and loud voices filled the evening air. lots of people were dancing and having fun, splashing and pushing each other down in the salty water. the sun was still high up in the sky, though it was 8 o'clock.

- v baby! how ya doin, come here! a guy named tyler had spotted me and immediately headed towards me with his arms open. he kissed me on my forehead not willing to let go of me. i pushed him away and said:

- tyler, this is my friend scott, and scott, this is tyler.

- hey, what's up, scott said and tyler answered him with a nod.

- come on! i said with a huge smile, took scott's arm and led him into the massive crowd of people.

          then i spotted natasha.

- hiiii! oh my god, you came!! she said being extremely hyper.

- hey! are you drunk already? i said

- nooo, what are you talking about! here, take this, she said and handed me a beer. then her eyes caught scott standing behind me. she gave me a look meaning "m'm, who is this hunk?". i leaned towards her, whispering in her ear: he'll be mine before this night is over... i took a step back, smiled and looked at her. she opened her mouth and stared at me, then her lips formed a smile, gave me a bottle and said: booze, then she went away.

after three hours of dancing, a couple of beers, and an empty bottle of booze (that i had shared with scott of course), we were all full of sweat. i looked at scott, and his eyes seemed to glitter. the sun was on its way down and its beams painted the sky pinkish orange. he looked at me. i came closer and stood on my toes (i had taken off my high heels), his chest touched mine. his heart beated with the same rythm of my heart. i slowly leaned forward, and so did he. i smiled and quickly turned my head to the side. i thought "i want him, but i'm not going to let him believe he can have me so easily. i'm going to play with him for a while".

then i whispered in his ear: come on.

          i led him to the huge rocks by the water. i sat down on a big, flat rock and looked out over the ocean. he got down right next to me, so close his leg touched mine. i looked at him, his eyes were fixed on the sky. i squinted my eyes and bit carefully on my lip, something i always did when i wanted someone. he turned his head towards me, and we gazed at each other. the salty air was hot and humid, even though it was late and the weather gave away a few winds every now and then. the surface of the water sparkled in the sunlight as the waves hit the edge of the rock. a deep line between his eyebrows appeared as he frowned. there was this tension between us that grew, and suddenly it was as if all i could hear was my own heart beating. it felt like every breath that i took, i wanted him more and more. i'm about to go crazy.

          then he finally spoke out:

- don't you think it's wierd? that we're sitting here together right now after ten years of not seeing each other? acting like we've met every day, having fun, dancing, laughing with each other...

"and wanting each other" i thought, but didn't say it.

- yeah... i know.

a moment of silence.

- i dreamt about you. he said and looked at me. - you wore a white dress and you were dancing on the top of a high cliff, then suddenly you slipped and fell down. but somehow i was down there, standing on the water and i caught you in my arms, it was really wierd... so basically, i saved your life there. he said and gave away a giggle. then he continued: then the next day, my parents told me we were to visit you. kinda like fate.

- i don't believe in fate, i said looking at him straight in the eyes

- you will... some day, he said in this mysterious kind of way.

- what, do you believe in fate then?

- no. but you're a girl. every girl thinks that everything that happens to them is fate. "ohh, my boyfriend broke up with me" then their girlfriends says "awwhh, it just wasn't meant to be. it just wasn't fate" he imitated. then he started laughing.

- not every girl thinks like that!

- what, you don't?

- no...

- then what do you believe then? he asked, starting to sound serious.

- i don't know.

i certainly did not want to talk about this with him. he was just a victim. and you don't talk feelings and beliefs with the victim. i would have him, then i would throw him away. he's just one out of a hundred. he's no one. whatever i do with him, will mean nothing. absolutely nothing. but, how come when these kind of thoughts filled my mind, i couldn't help but feeling a little bit of doubt stabbing my heart?