did i want him or did i not want him? as a one-day fling or something more? and what did he think about me? did he want me the same way as i wanted him? but i don't even know how i want him... why on earth am i feeling this way? this is not me! noo! i'm right. this is not me. i want him. for one day or two. then it's goodbye mr handsome...

          - so... do you have a boyfriend? he suddenly said out of nowhere.

- no. i answered shortly.

- no? you look like a girl who has a boyfriend, scott said and smiled.

- why? i said and frowned.

- don't act stupid vanessa. you know you can have any guy you want. you're beautiful, that smile of yours can make any guy fall, and your eyes... can hypnotize every guy, make them weak. you know how every school has this perfect, popular girl that every girl wants to be and every guy wants to be with?

- yes?

- that's you. he let his eyes leap along my body, from my face down to my toes, and back up again.

          i noticed his chest started to move heavier and his breathing got a little bit louder. he was still observing my body. i felt his strong desire to touch and grab me everywhere. i felt the same thing; how wonderful it would feel like to have his fit, tanned body pressed against mine; his lips on my neck then to slowly move their way to my own lips; to feel him suck my lips and to feel his breathing get more uncontrollable; his big hands touch along the inside of my thives; my own hands touching, caressing, exploring... it was as if he could tell what i was thinking because in the next second he was throwing himself over me. his soft lips were searching for mine, once found, our lips met in a fiery passion we could not escape. our tongues flicking and carassing. we both breathed in the same rhythm that followed time; tick, inhale; tock, exhale; tick, inhale; tock, exhale and so on. his hands went down inside my dress, moving upwards, touching, feeling. i felt the bulb of his sex harden along with the pleasures he knew he was creating. it all happened so fast. i barely had any time to think. i was caught up in a mind full of lust and pleasure. every corner of my mind was occupied by him and there was no room for common sense.

          the waves hit the edge of the rock so hard it splashed water on us. he seemed to enjoy my body was wet and sticky by the ocean water and the humid air. but the water was like a wake up call. what was i doing? i gave away to easily! now he will think i'm cheap and easy that will give away for anything. damnit. i pushed him away and immediately got up on my feet. then i went towards the center of the party. i hated myself for letting him kiss me. i was supposed to be the seducer, not the seducee! now everything was ruined. for all my teenage life i had never given any sign of weakness, i had never let a guy rule over my body and possess it, i had been strong, i had been the one making them fall, not them making me fall. had i become weak?